Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
im pretty sure i just dented her unborn child.
i realized i had a pad on before i went to this guys house so i stuck it in his neighbors shrub.
The last memory I have is vomiting into a box and her rubbing my back saying "you are such a trooper..."
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
I think he was trying to tie my clitoris in a knot with his tongue. So awful.
Oooo. Can we pretend to be Amanda Bynes?
She bought wigs like Disney princesses. I want to be her.
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
Question for you. Do you want to go out somewhere or do you want to have sloppy joes at my house? That's not a euphemism for anything; I actually have stuff to make sloppy joes
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
Ok I'm drunk as fuck already at 529 and this waitress started flirting with me, I wanna bang her for acknowledging my existence
who knew magic tricks and sex would actually go together?
Drunk. Come get me. Out front blue shirt.
Where are you? And you borrowed my shirt. I know what you're wearing. How wasted are you?
Hotel
WHICH HOTEL??
Randomize
