Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
there is nothing more satisfying than playing sudoku while pooping
We stole your phone last night, texted your brother and told him you wanted it up the ass by him. All he said was "I want ur money."
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
he couldnt get it up, so i stole his lighter. i needed to have some reason to say the night wasnt wasted
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
Dude, you passed out sitting straight up AND in mid sentence last night
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
The groom's brother was an accomplishment. Then I remembered he was also the officiant. Check and check.
feeding cats lunchmeat on my kitchen floor. come pour me another shot.
Randomize