my mom just served us mashed potatoes with an ice cream scoop. When I asked her why, she said she thought it would make dinner 'more fancy'...
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
he took off my shirt and said 'oh my god the legends are true'
Just know that as we speak i am injecting vodka into gushers
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
So apparently I threw a potted plant at a clown last night and told him to get his life together.
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
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