If you dont, I will tell Dad you are gay.
Fine, and I will tell him you fucked his business partner
Previous statement retracted.
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
it was like getting a handjob from robocop
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.
Sorry the STD update turned into an attempt at a bootycall, but at least we both know we're clean now
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
I remember her making the first martini but the rest of the weekend is a blur of vodka, high heels and sex toys.
First time being used by a cougar. Definitely okay with it
Randomize
