he rolled over and started playing skeeball on his iphone after we had the best sex yet considering he only lasted 10 seconds last time.. im getting standards.. tomorrow. for now im just going to enjoy the fact i counted over 20 this time.
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
I just ate a whole pineapple for lunch. You should be begging to give me a bj tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
I've thrown up twice at work. Just casually, in the mop sink. Then continued to make someone a milkshake. Want some ice cream?
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
No don't worry! What are obnoxious, alcoholic, slut roommates for if not for uplifting words and tales of my folly?!
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
She was talking about how a garden gnome was hitting on her the whole night. We thought she was just that high, but turned out the gnome was that guy in the weird hat.
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