His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
Managed to convince my mom that I had been home for 3 hours sleeping on the couch downstairs and this t-shirt was your dads. I am SUCH a fucking boss.
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
Totally just drove past you riding your bike. I was like damn, that looks like a cute little hipster boy, and then I realized it was you and that I'd already banged you and it kinda made my day. I hope you're well. Come over soon?
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
She told him that she never wanted to see him again then took his takeout box of bacon cheddar fries and got in the uber saying "for feminism"
I have "if found please return to" written in sharpie on my arm, my uterus is rejecting everything, and I have hickies. I must actually be an 18 year old piece of shit girl instead of a responsible 23 year old
How did I get the fat lip, while puking I may or may not have sneezed... Wacking my face into the toilet bowl...
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