I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
My mom came into my room and told me to flip off the tv. I gave it the middle finger. Note to self: STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
Today my mom told me "that's what worries me about you getting blacked out drunk... You don't look pretty"
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
Do you remember me making bird noises at the bartender with some guy at the bar last night?
She left a blanket, pillow, a glass of water, and two advils in the bathroom for me. It's like she knew. Best room mate ever.
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
You grabbed your house keys, threw them at the door and asked, "did it open?"
I mean seriously...It's like the universe is saying "your vagina is closed, move along"
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
Hey, sorry I choked you last night... I was just really excited to see you.
Our conversation went from you choking me to my quarter life crisis reeeaaalllll quick.
Randomize
