If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
i really wish someone from a royal background would fuck me so i could literally say i was 'royally fucked'.
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
Oh. And what's the twitter protocol for following the guy you blew behind a shed?
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
Looking back on this weekend, I'm most grateful I never brought up with word "toe-fucking" at the bachelorette party.
I'm too socially awkward and sexually frustrated to get through this evening sober.
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
It's a good thing vaginas don't have taste buds
I broke a rule
Which One?!
The one where I shouldn't sleep with your friends. I broke this particular rule 4 times.
You're officially the worst brother ever.
drinking vodka out of a wine glass to feel a little bit classier about myself.
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
Randomize
