nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
What did we do last night that was yellow?
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
I just threw up while getting a haircut. I'm never trying to accomplish stuff with a hangover again.
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
The dog just did a longer kegstand than anyone at the party
It's too hard to jack off and hold an ipad at the same time
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
You kept running up to random groups of people and saying "I'm a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader so we all have to chug our drinks!" and they all listened to you.
Seriously, do normal people actually get work done being this hungover? No wonder the economy's in the shitter
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
Do you remember the bathroom attendant when he put out his hand for a tip and you gave him a high five?
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
Randomize
