I brought my laptop into the bathroom so I can facebook while vomiting. New low?
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
This time, try to not get fingered in the middle of the living room.
I DIDNT GET FINGERED
I was rubbed
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me.
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
He literally cried into his tacos and screamed fuck bitches. Don't know if it was the best, or the worst hook up, ever.
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
Randomize
