So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
I walked into the bathroom of the hotel and she's in the bath tub with a guy she met a day ago. They were sharing a shrimp cocktail platter and shot gunning bud lights. Oh and it was noon.
So after your set last night some 42 year old woman bought me a drink, professed her love for your music, and then made out with me last night because she thought I was you. Thank you.
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
did i just pee glitter
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
Randomize
