no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
his dog just threw up on me too. its like im a throwup magnet to that family.
Just caused a nice traffic jam while trying to park at Costco. Too high to drive.
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
so my pro life roomate found a used condom wrapped up in her sheets with your panties. never letting you have sex in her bed again
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
I just ate cottage cheese and went to the gym at 6 this morning...the things i'll do because I might get naked in front of a new boy
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
well whats the tarot card for I'm totes going to be schlobbing his cob? because that's in his future.
You ran up a $300 bar bill on his card and he didn't have you arrested, be grateful and move on.
i think we sleep fucked last night...
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
We should write a country song: “Blacked Out on a Sunday”
Randomize
