JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
She turned over and said "You smell like my dad, i just can't do this"
I just opened a bunch of old flavored condoms just to see what they tasted like.
Nothin says happy bday jesus like a shot with your loved ones.
you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
The countdown is at hand. We are 15 days from so much Jameson that names will be forgotten. Prepare your liver now or severe projectile vomiting will be the theme of the night.
Dude. I realize why I got sick. 8 shots three beers in an hour. Plus I ate an expired lunchable earlier.
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
