fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
checking your phone to see who you drunk dialed last night isnt as funny when you see you had a 17 minute call to your dad.
you refused to leave the drive-thru at mcdonalds until the cashier took a jello shot
Hey, I can't get ahold of Tommy. Let him know his ex-girlfriend is pregnant.
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
You're like Jane Goodall in a forest of gay men. Someday your autobiography will be called "Bottoms in the Mist".
Oh dude I know. When something that's supposed stop pregnancies taste like chocolate something's up
I'm about to make existential crisis tacos.
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
So I think I've successful blown my foot off in a way that's going to make you call me an idiot.
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
You know you're getting old when you pick up hot sorority girls at the bar, and they write down their phone number, and under it 'we're great babysitters!'
Randomize
