His hospital is closing...I consider it "sorry you're losing your job" sex.
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
Me. You. Shitty green clothes from Savers that we will dub alligator costumes. Middle of the quad tomorrow at noon. Bring your alligator voice and the pearls before swine comic.
Your friend who drunkenly cleaned the kitchen just wished the class a Happy National Tutu Day. While wearing a tutu. Make a move or I'm gonna marry her.
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
I pulled out moves I did not even know I possessed, our fucking de-throned gods
Children cease to be precious when they crap their shorts in the pool I exercise at.
This is classic penis vs brain.
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
I mean seriously...It's like the universe is saying "your vagina is closed, move along"
I accidentally sent my dad a very explicit Star Wars fanfiction and he replied with "That was great!"
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
I'm currently using a band-aid to cover my bar stamp from last night while I ask my professor for an extension. That's a sign of getting more responsible, right?
Randomize
