my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
tonight lets celebrate not being married
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
After a couple hours you decided you were going to walk home but ten minutes later you called and said you'd puked by the side of the road and you needed us to drive you to the art museum.
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
I don't know what he did to me, but he did it wrong. I think my pelvis is broken. I cant even drive without it hurting. What. The. Fuck.
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
I went to McDonald's this morning still half drunk with penises drawn all over my body, when my card was declined the cashier asked if I needed Jesus
My doctor actually said I was suffering from an "acute hangover" in doctor's note I asked him for....what a douche
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
Randomize
