True but thats because hes a fetus.
the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
Sign she's a keeper: "I would rather be late to brunch than waste a perfectly good boner."
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... Men can be so sensitive...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
Well he was mad because I chose tequila over him. He obviously doesn't understand that he will always be second to my first true love.
I learned a very valuable lesson tonight...don't touch a cops tazer
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
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