I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
I found them in the kitchen microwaving bottle rockets chanting U.S.A U.S.A U.S.A
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
We got the possum out of our house. We built a maze with our empty kegs and chased it with brooms.
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that
You know you need to get it together when a frat guy wakes you up and says you need to go to class
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
She thought I was dancing but I just couldn't catch my balance for 11 blocks.
Randomize
