I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
My friends, they love my intelligence
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
I was officially considered the drunkest person in cuba when the bartender at the swim up bar made me wear a life jacket for 'safety purposes'
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
Mistake of the day: loudly discussing my gay hookups on the phone at the dmv in upstate NY... this must be what leprosy feels like
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
He sang a ten minute song about me sitting on his face and eating quesadillas. Pretty sure I have to marry him.
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
"I mean like shit happens" should never be an excuse for anything
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
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