Banned from zoo.
Again?
I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance.
You've picked up chicks by quoting metal bands
When they're drunk they believe it's Shakespeare...enjoy the simple things
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
You left a trail of sequins from your dress incase we got lost
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
I should never have to text my best friend asking if she eloped again last night.
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
Randomize