to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
The only thing I have to prove last night happened is a fireman's hat full of puke.
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
She woke me up with an urgent call telling me she was rolling on Mollie and swimming in the ocean. I mean that's just great. If she drowns, I'll feel responsible.
I realize it truly is impossible to burrow under the grass like a mole. Let's not drink for at least another 3 days.
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
Most drunken moment of the night is me pouring Chanel no. 5 all over your boobs and rubbing it in...
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
Remember the time you cried about coconuts
Yeah, but i got vodka and bacon out of it, so it's fine.
Christ, I'm so hungover I pretty positive I sent Luna to school with salsa instead of jelly on her sandwich.
Randomize
