So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
Why can't burritos get me drunk
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
Rum and your dick are involved. You're relying on the unreliable narrator.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My chance to home wreck was right in front of me and I didn’t grab it by the balls
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
Hey I need you to run the morning meeting, for reasons I can explain when I find out where I left my car
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
I have been adopted by a clan of drunken skinny dipping tourists.
The only good thing about 2020 is that the hot flight attendant neighbors are using my pool a lot. If i can keep them from wandering into my Zoom meeting with my boss I’m golden
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