i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..
He says he's "masters drunk." And if that's anything like "kentucky derby drunk" I know enough to not go over there.
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
The bottle of Jameson may have been a bit aggressive for a Sunday cookout.
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
I asked her how many times she came and she said "Oh god I can't count that high, Rutgers doesn't teach us that."
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
Woke up with a padlock locked onto my ear gauge and the first of many sticky note clues on my chest leading to the key.
Is it weird that I'm smoking a cig on my back patio in a sports bra and underwear?
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
Convinced if I was being murdered in my house no one would come and save me. If no one heard my 10000000 orgasms last night, there is no hope.
Randomize
