A squiggle pen was my first vibrator back when I was young. I would lock myself in my bedroom with that thing. Oh to be 8 again.
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
I just mistook cooking oil for the whiskey that was also on the counter... They're the same colour. That was not a good shot... I need to not drink alone.
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
Damn it. Can't order pizza. Can't do the hot tub. No one to invite over for loud, kinky sex. What's the point of being here alone?!
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
Randomize