we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
then the nurse gave me a bag with my personal belongings: phone, wallet. jacket, keys and a BTB burrito
They had some plan b on the table between the beer and the guacamole. Yeah, it's gonna be a fun party.
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
Yah. I'm gonna lay you down and feed you grapes, except I'm gonna replace grapes for my balls
You yelled at me about a fork.
You probably deserved it, I'm very territorial about my cutlery.
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
Randomize
