But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
I can tuck mytits in my pants
you told his mom that the only thing he wants for christmas is his dick in your mouth
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
We just filmed our own version of iron chef. The secret ingreient was whisky.
What did you cook with whisky?
We started a fire.
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
If you already knew specifically that I was smoking a bowl in my remodeled bathroom AND THEN still wanted to initiate sexting, please proceed to the altar and marry me this instant.
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
Dick very happy bro
Who knew sons of strippers would be really feminist boyfriends?
Man, it's really obvious that I was either handcuffed or tied up last night. Either way, not something you'd want coworkers knowing.
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
Randomize
