I will die if light touches me.
Sometimes I get depressed that my son is too young to understand how hot his babysitter is.
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
I refuse to go to this wedding alone, or sober. Practice drunk-walking in heels and a Bridesmaid dress begins tonight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
Apparently being drunk on a southwest flight and yelling "TURNUP" during take off is looked down upon in this state.
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
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