We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
So my mom just called me into her room and showed me a condom wrapper she found in my room. "Oh that's from when I was like 16." I don't think that was very comforting.
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
I apparently started to text you last night. All it said was 'the whole clam'. I hope that means something to you.
You yelled "hold my dick" before you tackled the guy away from the dj and two random girls moved to actually hold it, then argued about it. I want that whore aura!
Make the kitchen floor stop waving. Im trying to lay on it
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
I'm like 87% sure some random guy starting biting my ear after grinding me for like 30 seconds... I feel suprisingly unconcerned
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
This is the second girl that said she wanted to fuck me while wearing a clown nose. Fuck online dating
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
The neighbors ahemed the WHOLE time. Their kids are the ones that scream loud enough for me to remember my birth control. It's payback!
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