Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
Midget Michael Jackson impersonator dancing to Beat it in Penn Station almost caused me to miss my train. God, I
I was so high last night that i'm 89% sure my roommates set up an obstacle course for me and timed it. Not positive.. I think one of the challenges was pairing shoes
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
YOU HAVE TO STOP TELLING BARTENDERS WE DON'T HAVE MORAL STANDARDS
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
Jamie's fucking a senior citizen and I'm eating chips and salsa in the shower at 2am, so whatever you're doing it can't be worse.
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
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