i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
I woke up naked on the bathroom floor. the tile grout marks on my boobs hurt, i mananged to use a roll toilet paper as a pillow. never again. did we eat salad?
I fake pass out to avoid hookups sometimes. Last night I fake slept on my bathroom floor for like 2 hours before the guy left.
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
random memory from the wedding, the bartender show us how to open the windows of the hotel and pee out of them
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
He went THROUGH MY PHONE (he's 30 for God sake) then asked me why I was stringing along 12 guys... I told him he could have just asked me if I was banging other people and then saved himself from looking at pics of dicks bigger than his.
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
You, me, naked, mistletoe, fifth of jack, gallon of lube, condoms, Cheetos, handcuffs, rope, along with no morals, inhibition or judgment. That's all I want for Christmas.
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
I spent two entire hours explaining to a guy why I wouldn't make out with him. How was your night?
Always keep a stash of tequila in your work desk. That is like adulting 101.
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
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