drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
I have a deodorant stick dedicated to my balls.
only if we run a train.
done.
I hate the hobo that sits outside our building
Joe or Chris?
do i even wanna kno y u kno their names?
well i came home drunk one night and Chris offered me a beer as i was coming in, it was kinda weird but i wasn't goin to deny a free beer. you're proolly talkin about Joe though, he's the one with the fucked up eye.
Note to self: Don't teach the naked lap rule in beer pong until after youve made a cup..
I am solely responsible for the birth of their child. I mean, I did push them into the room and hold the door shut yelling "punch that kitty!". It has to be a sign.
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
Only he would come to a strip club and talk about an internship with Walt Disney during a lap dance.
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
Know what I do when I'm in that mood? Whenever anyone talks to me I just hiss like a cat. They go away.
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
Well you’re enrolled in an Ivy League grad school and I’m currently at a 2 star holiday inn in rural PA so who is really thriving here
Randomize
