So I have to go swallow an entire zebra. Ur on ur own girl.
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
Randomize
