I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
no i brought the cat to the bar. I got a weird look when I walked in but now everyone loves her.
Sorry you called when I was puking in a cheetos bag
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
I drink more single than I do in relationships. Except with assface.
foreskin is a definite game changer
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
I just overheard this sorority girl saying "It's like trick or treting but for alcohol and with no costumes." I'm jealous.
Yeah, reverse cow girl. She was on top and I was playing Flappy Bird behind her back. Easiest way to have angry sex.
Didn't want to waste the cheese dust from the white cheddar popcorn, so I gave him a handjob, followed by the most delicious blowjob ever. Win-win.
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
Randomize
