You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
google maps should a have a setting for this. like I AM ABANDONING EVERYTHING TO MEET A GIRL WHO IS 10 HOURS OF MILES AWAY. HOW DO WE DO THIS OPTIMALLY?
I can't bring an entire liter in the bar in my purse. I mean I can. I might. I'm probably gonna.
You motherfucker. I just had an MRI with a penny under my boob.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If my neighbors have super loud sex again tonight, I'm going to leave a ball-gag and roll of duct tape in their mail slot.
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
there must be tiny pirates in the freezer stealing our rum.
Randomize