At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
I molested 6 butterflies tonight
He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
Stars make me really horny. Especially that shiny one its just staring at me.
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
I went outside for a smoke at 4 and things seemed normal. It's 6 now and the front lawn is COVERED in tortilla chips. WTF?
Oh no it's bring yor chld to work day...I'm too drunk for this
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
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