Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
I don't even have to sign up for karaoke at duncans anymore. The karaoke ppl just sign me up themselves. Without my consent. I also sang stacys mom to some lady named Stacy who's mom died yesterday.
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
im gonna make a bucket list just so i can cross off "underwater blowjob"
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
The moment you realize you should grow up: you're snorting your fathers percocet script with your old health insurance card, while your parents are on a 10 day cruise in the carribean...
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
Your headphones are on the door knob and I left you a burger on the door step.
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
All I remember about last st pattys day was I was in a bathtub with full bubbles, fully clothed, drinking out of a flamingo lawn ornament that someone cut a hole in.
The lowest point of my life has been reached. I just drank half a jar of pasta sauce.
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
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