yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
A friday without alcohol is hardly a friday at all
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
He pulled over in the Compass Bank parking lot so I could dry-heave, but I decided I couldn't vomit there because "I bank here."
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
Take your time. I'm mowing the lawn. In the dark. Drunk.
I stole a tiki torch last night and just returned it. Things have been better.
Got promoted and on my way out the door was informed that my beard makes my face perfect for riding. Today is gonna be a good day.
Does being an adult mean drunkenly signing for your tax return from a foreign country? If so, I've reached adulthood.
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
I'm having a hard time eating my sandwich knowing how many different buttholes my hands were in last night.
As you were falling you yelled out, "save my burrito!" Priorities
Randomize
