just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
I fucked **** last night, don't tell mike
this is mike. we're done.
i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
The $10 cab ride turned into a $60 cab ride when you puked down the back of his seat trying to whisper in his ear. He was a trooper though, he came into to wash off in the sink and still tried to get your number.
No gay bar. My eyemake up looks like sex and Im using these dick daggers of mine tonight.
He showed up to a baby shower and kept telling everyone he was late because he was pregaming. And then tried honking the pregnant girls tits
I'm not breaking up with him because his husky is having puppies.
Vodka, rum, moonshine, I don't care, just bring like 5gallons.
Wait an hour then go and untie him. Bring toilet paper and some spare underwear. Want anything from Starbucks?
Randomize
