Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
I just woke up under a kitchen table with my sandals taped to my feet and a corona bottle taped to my hand..
My dad assaulted a TSA agent this morning. Shut down airport security. Don't tell me that your family is embarrassing.
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
I pretty much told him I was too sober for this an just walked away and all I heard was "IT'S BECAUSE IM A BAD KISSER ISN'T IT" OVER AND OVER AGAIN
He was asleep with his head on a windowsill and you were petting his head, then you almost left the kitchen and then went back to pet him some more.
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After a beer I realize now I may have shared too much about my obsession with ghosts with my therapist this morning.
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
A guy I don't even know just ate me out on a washing machine at a random persons afterparty. I came as it was going through spin cycle.Just kept thinking "who does laundry during a party?"
I refuse to shit my pants for anyone except Cher and Christina Aguilera!
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
Randomize