I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
Just deleted any ex boyfriends and potential lovers from my phone in preparation for Vegas...
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
I woke up with the Dorothy costume at my ankles, both sparkly red shoes on, and clutching ToTo....we're not in Kansas anymore, dude
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
Well, I woke up on a roll-away, with a knot in the back of my head and penis confetti stuck to me. Also, I apparently literally gave the shirt off my back right before I passed out, so I was topless. Vegas won this trip.
I just need you to appreciate that this is the first time I've ever been cut off and it's at an airport bar in Philly before 1 o'clock in the afternoon.
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
I DID NOT GO INTO HOURS OF STRENUOUS LABOR FOR YOU TO LOOK LIKE A DOMINATRIX BARMAID ON A WEEKDAY. AT LEAST SAVE IT FOR THE WEEKEND GDI.
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
Randomize
