i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
So we were banging and she started puking all over my bed. I'm not sure what's worse, her puking, or that I felt the urge to start singing Flip-adelphia.
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
The boys wrestled in the living room for the last condom while the girls chanted, "THE LAST MELON."
This guy kept trying to use "see? I'm clean. Cleared by the plasma place today." as a pick up line. This is not okay.
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
At one point, the bartender wrote out the words "please kill me" on some receipt paper and slid it across the bar to me.
Randomize
