Vodka is such a love hate relationship.
Truer words have never been spoken.
The least you could do before I go into your room is throw away the condom wrapper from the other girl I know you're banging.
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
I sang him a lovely rendition of 'So Long and Thanks For All the Fish", but replaced fish with dick.
Okay so I'm high eating chili cheese fries bra-less watching Mulan, could I be doing any better at life right now?
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
She text me that night and asked how the dick was and I quote my drunk self "average at best"
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
My neighbor is burning all of her ex's things in a metal drum outside the window. Guess who's going to make a new friend?
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
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