The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
He took a shot, then proceeded to puke into the bucket he was iceing his broken foot in
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have the perfect view of a sexy blonde in yoga pants stretching from the shoulder press machine. I'll be here all night. So glad I came high.
Ur here with me in spirit. Now run free. Run free
Shit, my parents are coming over and I just realized that a grinder is not an acceptable paperweight
The extent of "getting it in" was this creepy guy sticking his finger in my bellybutton
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like my map app knows I'm hungover and is strategically not driving me by fast food places so I cannot stop
There can only be one screw up per family and I was here first. Get your shit together bro
Some dude just said my hair smells like his pillows
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
Next thing I know her tits are out on my desk. It was straight out of a porno. What was I supposed to do I’m not made of stone
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