White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
im pretty sure this vending machine only exists when im drunk
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
Speaking of roommates, Kelsey and I woke up to urine in our trash can. Neither one of us is willing to admit to it so we've come to the conclusion that someone snuck into our room in the middle of the night
I got a dollar bill stuffed into my bra on two separate occasions by two separate guys simply for having boobs. I feel like somewhere god is patting himself on te back while pointing at me goin "you're welcome dude." easiest two bucks I ever made.
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
I immediately retract my statement involving hylecopters being allowed to blow up sharks out of the water.... The idea if it is super incredible but ultimately it would be cruel and unessesary
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
I can now recognize that when my wine bottle reaches a certain point, I probably shouldn't tweet, text or call anyone. RESPONSIBILITY
dude, she has my telletubby sweats and my good sweatshirt hostage, I can't risk their safety with a breakup
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
Hold on gotta plunge the sink
Is that a euphemism for sex? Either way, have a good time
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