check it out our google latitudes are spooning
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
There are GROWN MEN with fake HP wands flinging curses at me in Walmart.
That's funny. Are they weird looking???
OF COURSE THEY ARE WEIRD LOOKING, THEY ARE STALKING ME IN WALMART. WITH. FAKE. WANDS.
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
You called me 32 times last night just to tell me you felt a heartbeat in your vagina?
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
Because I know nothing is hotter than ocean themed dick pics on SnapChat...
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
I'm sitting here with a heating pad and a fan on me eating snow caps off of my boobs
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
My potted cactus died. I am literally less nurturing than the desert.
Randomize
