This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
dude, i was at the student union last night trying to study but some retarded sorority spent an hour voting on the color of the seasons shirts like it was a UN meeting- someone motioned purple, someone objected, and half an hour later after 2 recounts they decided on purple
you will always have a special place in my vag
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
P.S. It's common courtesy to let the girl your banging know if she's about to walk into the same place your girlfriend is at so she can get her poker face ready
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
Your lack of enthusiasm for my exciting news of drunken debauchery with an otherwise occupied vagina of one of my greatest conquests yet disturbs me. I'm not happy with you
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
2016 was supposed to be my year of being a ho, but I guess 2017 might be too.
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
so idk what that means but now because of me he has a police file as breaking into my apartment and sleeping in my hallway under the carpet
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
Randomize
