the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
Omg my grandpa just told me he wants to die in his 90's shot by a jealous husband
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
At second job interview this week. Wearing pants to hide pole dancing bruises. This my life.
But theres a keg here and me gusta
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
There's a cute bearded guy at this brew fest wearing a kilt and selling mead
TELL HIM ABOUT MY DOWRY!!!
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
I think you're literally the first guy to ever pick up a chick from pinterest.
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
I would have wore underwear last night if I knew I had to change a tire this morning
Randomize
