I wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commercials.
my mom just called and warned me someone is trying to serve me, i feel like i'm playing an extreme game of hide and go seek these next weeks
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
FYI the landlord called, said we need to clean the puke off the side of the house...was someone on the roof lastnight??
We made a bet that we had to talk like Yoda all night at the bars
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heโs Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a taco in my pocket for later because I am a practical drunk
Speaking of boners I learned how to say " jizz everywhere" in sign language
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
๐๐๐ what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
If youโre wondering why the bong is outside the garage door just know I was being environmentally efficient by not using the freezer to chill my shit
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
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