where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
my goal in life is to wake up with my underwear on
You know how you thought that you put on a condom last weel?
yea
turns out that you did...and i just found it.
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
I can hear the condescending tone from the atm when it asks if $3 is all I would like to deposit
Let me just say....i'm sorry about setting your carpet on fire. I had no idea that the paper towel would burn that quickly.
Dear room mates I tried to shotgun pam in the kitchen. It is slippery. Please be careful. That is all. Love you.
I was taking a bath and he burst in, sat down and started taking a shit. RIGHT BESIDE ME. My lack of privacy astounds me.
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
I'm just going to eat my milkshake, watch teen wolf, masturbate, and lament my inability to form meaningful relations with men who aren't gay
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
Had a dream we were competing for tomatos.
Randomize
