We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
New years is officially the only time its okay to drunk dial your parents.
I'm giving up shame for lent. Here come the best 40 days and nights of my life.
Any questions about why there was a scuba tank chilling in the hot tub this morning?
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
Dude I think my special talent is falling in drunkenly falling in front of a cop and getting away. This is the second time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
Look I know it's late and I hope this doesn't wake you up but I feel like you should know that I'm sleeping on my couch in my own apartment so that my friend can get laid in my bed, and I would do the same for you.
Out of desperation, I used the leftover sauce from my goat masala as a mixer for vodka shots.
I just got a nosebleed on a date at the cheesecake factory...
just run out of the bathroom with blood gushing down your face and scream "ITS IN THE CHEESECAKE!!!!!"
I think I'll bring the beer we scavenged from that other party. What goes around comes around, especially when it's Corona because that shit is not staying in my fridge
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
Randomize